Answering Questions About Auspicious Weddings
The procedures of an ancient Chinese marriage are captured within the phrase "Three (3) Letters and Six (6) Etiquettes".
The 3 Letters are the engagement letter, the delivery of gifts letter and also the taking of the bride letter.
In ancient times, if a man is excited about a woman, he will engage a middlemen (a middle-women actually) to explore the possibility and if appropriate to convey his intentions to the woman's family. In the event the woman's family finds him acceptable, they will notify him and he can make the official proposal by delivering the formal letter of engagement on an auspicious date.
At this stage the women's family can still say no to the proposal. As you would expect you will discover still a whole lot of things to sort out as well as to negotiate over.
Should the proposal is accepted, the next step is to deliver wedding gifts to the woman's family. These wedding gifts that are normally expensive are accompanied by the 'Delivery of Gift' letter which is essentially a list of items and quantity much like a delivery order! By signing this letter and taking delivery of the gifts, it signifies the women's family acceptance of the marriage.
The itemized 'Delivery of Gift' letter is also a safeguard against pilferage through the delivery team!
The third letter is described as the 'Taking the Bride' Letter as it is the letter that the groom produces when he arrives at the bride's home on the wedding day. Upon acceptance of the letter, the bride is deemed to have joined the groom and become a member of the groom's family.
It is not surprising why the bride mothers weep uncontrollably on wedding days. It is like losing a daughter!
It refers to the six main procedures in an ancient Chinese marriage. It includes the official proposal, choosing the auspicious date checking of Ba Zi (compatibility using a system of Chinese Astrology), selection of auspicious date for the wedding, delivery of gifts, confirmation of wedding dates and ultimately the wedding itself.
After the man has set his eyes on the girl, he sends an official proposal to the woman's family. Once the proposal is accepted, he will seek the services of an astrologer to determine if they are compatible. Research may also be done to guarantee that there isn't any blood relationship between them. At this stage the engagement may be called off whenever they are not compatible or if perhaps their blood line are somewhat connected.